everyday hospitality. [and a giveaway!]

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“For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.” – Isaiah 43:19

So many times I expect God to work the way He’s always worked.  My small vision can’t see past the familiar and to the unknown.  As the seasons change, shouldn’t we expect the ways we live and minister to shift?

I am in a difficult season with parenting.  I’ve entered the season of “marathon days” – the ones I’ve watched in awe as my friends with “big kids” do before me.  I always wondered “how do they do it?” with no naps, different schools, multiple extra curricular activities ALL while continuing to work and serve their home and community.  Well, I’ve somehow found myself in this place and all I can say is- you JUST DO IT.

it’s a new season and a new opportunity to loving my family and those the Lord has put in my path.

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My sweet friend Lizzie (above with Asher at her easter egg hunt last week!) gave me some great perspective over a glass of wine late one night.  She reminded me that in this season my “mentoring” younger girls might not look how it “should” or it used to.  More than meeting every single week to study a particular book, it looks like opening up my home.  It looks like letting these precious girls into my mess.  They quite literally come over and watch me make grilled cheese sanwiches for dinner when dads away, read to my kids at night, negotiate with my husband, unload the dishwasher, discipline my kids, all while we play and love and have deep conversation through the mess.

It doesn’t have to be perfect, it doesn’t even have to look how you THINK it should look, or the way it has looked before.  Community and deep friendship can look like + feel like everyday life.  It might mean inviting a couple over for dinner to eat take out, or wine and peppermint bark after the kids go to bed.  You will have to fight for those times of connection but I’m convinced that people simply want to be together!  All the while WE are so distracted by trying to have it all together before we invite them in.

I am challenging us to let them in despite the mess!  That’s real life, and that’s what people love to be a part of.

When that small voice screams at you that you/your home/your cooking “aren’t enough”, tell it to be quiet in Jesus name and press forward into deep community and love anyway.  It’s scary to be exposed in that way, but I promise you it’s worth it.

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“We all struggle with feelings of not being good enough, not having enough, and not belonging enough.  I have found that the most effective way to overcome these feelings of inadequacy is to share our experiences.  Of coarse, in this culture, telling our stories takes courage” – Brene Brown, I Thought It Was Just Me.

I am loving this book by Brene Brown (a shame researcher) – knowing that shame is universal and we all struggle with it.  I want to start a conversation about community, and WHY we struggle to really let people in behind the curtain.

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Talk to me! What are your unique challenges to deep community + connection with those in your city/church/community?

I’m so excited to be collaborating with my new friend Tabitha on this post.  I love connecting with other women who are passionate about community and deep friendship.  She’s starting the conversation over on her blog, and we are doing a little Noonday giveaway 🙂  go to her blog to enter! 

Hey, I'm Wynne!

Hi, friend! First, I truly am so giddy that you are here. I want you to know I believe in you and all the ways you are growing towards living a more intentional life.  I genuinely hope you are encouraged from our time together here.

A little about me, I’m a type 7 on the enneagram, a total extrovert + people lover, entrepreneur, connector, storyteller, people gatherer, and passionate wife, mama + friend. I feel most alive when I’m exploring new places and surrounded by people I love. Give me a day in the outdoors disconnected from wifi, and I am a happy girl. I run on oat milk lattes, Jesus, gratitude journaling and kitchen dance parties with my four kids.
Welcome, come on in!

let'e be friends

  1. Nina Heselton says:

    The biggest challenge I face is moving from having acquaintances to developing true, genuine community. It is a challenge stepping out to tell others, “hey, I want to be in community with you!” Moving out of College Station soon and this is a fear I have as I enter into a new city, with new people, and finding a new church. Praying for boldness and courage, that Jesus would send messy, broken people who love Him into my life.

  2. Love your thoughts about inviting people into the mess! My biggest struggle in this area is that I have 18-month-old twins that go to bed at 7:30, and all our friends have young children too, which leaves us all stuck at home at night. I’m finding we have to be WAY more intentional about spending time with friends during this season. But we desperately need community now more than ever. Thanks for your post encouraging us to find creative ways to build community!

  3. Libby says:

    I adore this (as usual), Wynne. 😉 Speaking right to my heart… learning that “hide away” seasons are just as important as “active ones” and the value in each. Love you and your heart so very much!

  4. Kiera says:

    This resonated with me today, Wynnie! We used to love having people over but haven’t done it much since the baby — mostly because the house/our lives/the baby’s nonexistent sleep schedule have prevented me from welcoming others in. Thank you for the reminder! Also, I love Brene Brown

  5. Catherine says:

    I have been challenged to reach into my neighborhood, where I have lived over 25 years, to finally make some connections. There are women here of all ages, stages of life, and personal needs. I’m hoping to make a difference, just by opening up my home to gather for coffee some Saturday this spring. While it would be nice to have a perfectly clean and decorated house, with delightful refreshments etc., I want this to be real and authentic. If it turns out a bit messy, perhaps they’ll be more comfortable!

    P.S. Love Noonday! Daughter is an ambassador too!

  6. melba5 says:

    One of your greatest gifts is your intentionality in pressing deep. Drawn from the very second BEFORE I met you, we just jumped in. Shoes off, couch pillows on the floor, and tin mugs of wine and conversations about all the things…it hasn’t stopped since then. You are the very essence of Jesus in opening that door and I know every single person who watches you and Stephen debate over grilled cheeses with your kiddos is blessed for having entered. Love you, friend.

  7. Becca Ramsey says:

    i just hosted my very first noonday party. i was nervous about having people over, opening up my home, not having enough food, that it would be awkward bc people from different walks of life came over. but i did it, and it felt GOOD. God challenged me to the uncomfortable and it was so nice having people in my space, seeing where we live day to day.

  8. Jordan says:

    In a new season with a little (15 month old) and friends with littles, it’s hard to find time for community. However, when I fight for that time, it is SO worth it. This may look like a girls night out for dinner, having friends and their sweet kids over for dinner before the bed time routines begin, or simply finding time for an afternoon play date with another mom who’s in this season with me. I’m still a work in progress with putting action to my desire for community, but I have found that if I make time and put it on the crazy schedule of mine, it’s so refreshing and life giving to my soul. We need community, we need to be recharged in the presence of others. I’m going to strive to become better at it all this year 🙂

  9. Valerie says:

    I find its hard to be patient as community grows slowly and vulnerability is hard and unnatural. I am learning it’s about the process not the product

  10. Love this! I guess I used to feel a pressure (and still sometimes do a little) to have a picture perfect house and have my home ready to entertain before inviting others over. I want the food the be ready, games to be out, candles to be lit, etc. Almost as if I wasn’t a good hostess if I was in the kitchen while people were over. However, our new little 3-month-old is starting to show me how I can’t “have and do it all.” I love your point about making grilled cheese with young people over – it’s still just as much mentoring and just as much meaningful even if it seems “boring” to your past-season-self.

  11. So. This is hard and has been heavy on me lately. its my children. Every one of them has a special need (so to speak) from autism, developmental delays, attachment disorders, and all the appointments, case workers, attorneys, therapists….I get overwhelmed and I hide us all away because the last thing I want to do is get everybody ready, carry everybody downstairs, load em up and get us out there when I know meltdowns and tantrums are about to happen. Five different schedules and so many different needs. It keeps us indoors a lot more than we should be. But lately I’ve been feeling God nudging me out of my “comfort zone” and into community.

  12. Lisa says:

    Oh my, this is so spot on! Just last night I was praising my husband for his gift of hospitality and talking about how I just want my little house to be all mine. My private little get away. As I said it I knew it wasn’t right or true. Thanks!

  13. Jessica Mumford says:

    I think the challenge with community is finding like-minded—open, loving, deep….people, neighbors, friends that want community.

  14. Claire Cook says:

    I struggle alot with this season of my life (full time working mom of two littles, 3.5 and 1.5, with one on the way). Somehow and for some reason, God has blessed me with a close group of friends…who are mostly stay at home moms. There are many many, times where I feel disconnected and on the outside, and like maybe we have less in common that we once did. It’s hard to feel like any real community gets to happen, mainly due to life and scheduling. But God has also been faithful to bring other women in similar life stages into my life (also working moms of littles, our kids go to daycare together, we go to church together), that I may not have met otherwise. Sometimes it’s sad when community doesn’t look like we want it to, and has to be imperfect, or less frequent than maybe it was in the past (before kids). But I’m learning slowly to let go of my expectations of what I think it should look like, and take it for what it is now, and how it happens now. To everything there is a season. I appreciated this post, Wynne!

  15. Mimi says:

    My biggest challenge is opening up to people. And yet I crave those genuine, deep friendships. I’ve been really working at stepping out of my comfort zone and letting people in, but I’m so used to being on high alert that its hard to let that guard down sometimes.

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