wow, just wow. I am constantly amazed at God and how he works. I have loved reading and responding to your comments from my post last week . thank you for taking time to say hi and tell me a little bit about yourself. Sometimes it’s easy in the internet-land to sort of forget that people are actually reading my thoughts turned into words. You are real people, with real life experiences, real stories, and real struggles. Thank you for opening up your hearts and stories to me. and thank you for reading along this crazy story God is writing for our lives.
I was listening to a podcast a friend sent me this weekend about hope in the face of hopelessness and I was reminded that GOD IS REAL. Yes, reminded. sometimes I’m talking, praying, worshiping, journaling to God and sometimes I just blow right past the fact that HE IS REAL. He really sent his son to live a blameless life on this earth. Jesus really died on a cross for MY sin. He really rose from the grave! He really is making all things new.
even when I can’t feel him, hear him, see him working..He is there. Not only is GOD real, but my RELATIONSHIP with him is real. He really is my heavenly father. and He really is good. He is merciful, gracious, compassionate, and more concerned with my soul than my circumstances. in my waiting, in my desert season I have to REMEMBER constantly that God is real. I have to get in his word. even if I have to fight to believe, fight to hope…I will fight.
I know I’m not the only one in a season of waiting. I know that God has more for me than I could ever imagine. I know He’s asking me to submit to his full authority and TRUST him. God is working in my waiting, sanctifying me. he’s teaching me to trust! in the words of one of my new favorite worship songs “sovereign over us” by Aaron Keys…
“your plans are still to prosper / you have not forgotten us
you are with us in the fire and in the flood
faithful forever, perfect in love
you are sovereign over us.
even what the enemy means for evil, you turn it for our good,
you turn it for our good, and your glory
even in the valley you are faithful
you’re working for our good + for your glory”
friends, thank you for your grace.
and your patience we me. I’ve so missed this space. and you.
I really would love to know who all is out there reading?
what stage of life are you in? what season? what is your biggest obstacle? what’s your greatest dream?
what do you come to this space to find? // encouragement? stories? new places to shop? to know you aren’t alone in adoption or infertility?
I want this space to be a place where you are filled up and I also want it to be a place that gives me LIFE. and writing does just that. but before we go on….what would you like to hear about?
this place will still remain a place for me to share my thoughts, my heart, my fears and desires. a place to record the highs and lows of life. and the pieces that I share my heart have become my most favorite posts to go back to. so I’m about to get real.
but please, comment [through wordpress or Facebook!] and tell me who you are and what brings you here. I really do want to know you!
the first few weeks here have been hard. really hard. like my sweet son Camp, I too apparently really struggle with transitions. I don’t know if I just was so much of a dreamer that I assumed everything would play out perfectly here. maybe i have really high expectations. well, I know I have high expectations. i look back to our move from austin to midland that was completely different. then we were just married, no kids, and knew hardly anyone. that was such a time to find my own identity.
I learned so much those first few years who I was apart from my family and those who knew and loved me. it was painful, but it was worth it. we formed amazing relationships in midland, and built an amazing community. we were serving in local ministries and the church and by the time we left, were pretty connected. i guess i just assumed in my head that that same thing would happen here overnight. while last time we didn’t know anyone -this time we’ve been majorly connected to a community.
the people at our church have totally taken us in and for that, we are forever grateful. we are forming these friendships on a rock. it might take a while to build the history, but are headed in that direction.
i feel like i haven’t really gotten into any sort of rhythm. i have no routine. i want to get back into work, but it seems like i have no motivation. have all these great ideas and goals but something is holding me back from really going for them. is it time? am i too tired? fear? my kids really are taking every ounce of me. and it’s overwhelming. but i know that god will give me only what i can handle and there is grace enough for THAT DAY!
as I’m “wandering in the desert” I can trust that God is with me, He will never leave me and He will give me enough manna for each day. he’s asking me to TRUST him, and trust him I will.
“you keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you” Isaiah 26:3
words really do fail me to completely express to you the feeling and atmosphere at IF:Austin. 2,000 women gathered from all over the country in one room. it truly feels like one body…like the church, and we HAD church here last night as Melinda Dolittle led us in “break every chain”. The spirit was tangible, like we could reach out and feel the living God among us.
We are at war, and chains were beginning to fall last night. there is indeed an ARMY rising up, and it starts with us. with you, and with me.
“We are at war and the prize is faith.” -Jennie Allen
this is my personal biggest take away: faith is something I’ve struggled to understand this year. amidst hard things in my own life. what is my faith really in? what is faith? how do I get more faith? how do I make sure my faith is built on something real?
I’ve been trying to muster up enough faith to receive the promises of God.
I’ve had somewhat of a “crisis of faith” this year time and time again – waiting on the promises of God, believing and hoping IN HIM, but also in what he can give me. if I’m being honest.
Last night when Jen said “faith is not the formula to get the good stuff, it IS the good stuff” it wrecked me. FAITH IS THE PRIZE. Even if I go through this whole life journey and never reach the “other side” of healing or the things I’m believing for….HE IS ENOUGH. the journey to grow my faith IS ENOUGH. it’s worth it.
so faith, it “doesn’t demand that God explains himself”.
There have been times this weekend that we pause, turn to our neighbors and go through some great discussion questions. one of those questions for our little tribe last night was “what is faith mean to you” and as I was unpacking my friend Emily said something that also wrecked me. She asked, “so what happens if God does what you want him to, then what?”
quite honestly, I’ve thought through what happens if He doesn’t…He’s taken me on this journey the past 5+ years, but beyond thinking that He would get all the glory in my story, I hadn’t thought through what happens to my faith IF God decides to heal my body this side of heaven.
It makes me think about faith being the prize even more. It makes me want to know the character of God more. It makes me want HIM more, and not the “stuff” He can give me.
I’ve done a lot of confessing this weekend, and I know it was going on around the world last night with women dropping to our knees, raising our hands, and giving ourselves fully to the one who created us, the good father who loves us, and is sovereign over it all.
infertility may always be a part my story. I didn’t choose this path, and at times (like last night) I grieve it, and how it’s made my life look so different than I would have ever imagined. but God….BUT GOD! His plans for me are good, He is a good good father. my faith is becoming stronger, and that is my prize.
what about you? what is faith to you?
some other amazing nuggets I’ve taken away from this weekend:
“surround yourself with the people who speak what they see in you” – Bob Goff
“the broken place is also the breaking free place”- Ann Voskamp
“Somebody is looking at you – and someone needs to see you walk this journey of following God’s calling.”- Shauna Niequist
“Being faithful doesn’t mean you are fearless. It just means that your faith is greater than your fear.” – Christine Caine
“The call of God IS inconvenient” – Christine Caine
#ifgathering [follow the hashtag for more amazing nuggets]
hey there friends. so here’s the deal – when I started really using Essential Oils back in late August, I wasn’t really blogging that much. or I had a lot of other things going on? I’m not sure, but I never really blogged about how I started this whole journey with essential oils. SO! I’m sharing that story here with you! Last week I posted a quick chat I had with my oil mentor, Casey, but here’s some more in depth resources, books, and info for you. If you are interested in becoming an “oiler”, visit my essential oils page here.
I’ll tell you a little about our oil journey – I’ve used a few oils here and there for about a year, as friends have given them to me and instructed me on how to use them, but honestly y’all – it felt so overwhelming. I kept saying “next time I have $150 I’m going to go ALL IN on this…” but it took a while. I’ve heard so many great things about how to use essential oils in your home and with your children, to prevent sickness and keep everyone well, and while as a mom that is SUPER important to me, it still felt overwhelming to overhaul my whole “medicine cabinet”. Enter my good friend of 10+ years, Casey Wiegand. She opened my eyes to a whole other benefit of essential oils – using them for ME, and for my health and my womanly needs – oh the dreaded hormones!
She sent me to listen to this amazing webinar called The Dragon Slayer – addressing women’s health and hormones naturally [email me for password if you want to listen! ] and after listening to that, I got on the phone with her the next day and ordered not only my starter kit but a few other oils that were mentioned in this webinar, which is based on a book I’ve read called Taming the Dragon Within. I also have being doing research on infertility, which is something we have been struggling with for over 5 years, on this website and am also reading Inner Transformations Using Essential Oils Also by recommendation am reading another book along the same lines called Woman Code. I am so early in my research process, but finding it very interesting how our hormones [estrogen and progesterone], adrenals, thyroid, liver, colon etc affect EVERYTHING for us women.
I feel like I need some sort of disclaimer here, but there are a few Young Living oils that use for hormone balance + that time of the month- dragon time, joy, valor, clary sage, ylang ylang, progessense plus, and sclar essence. I think the thing I’m learning, is you have to be consistent. These oils aren’t like medicine, where you take them when you are sick – we have to be more preventative and proactive with them! I may be confessing to be an oil addict already…
I have just been so AMAZED at the power of the oils with my kids too! With them in school, and Camp + Asher being around lots of kids, it’s easy to worry about getting the first of the season cold come on. There are some really amazing resources for how to effectively and efficiently use oils for your kids – I’ve loved dog-earing so many pages of Gentle Babies . I put thieves on their feet in the mornings to help ward off this flu season. I ordered these awesome roller’s that I’ve mixed a “allergy bomb” and a “cold bomb” mixture to have on hand for Camp + Asher to rub on their feet and chest daily.
Ultimately y’all, there are SO MANY RESOURCES! If you are reading this and you are all, what the heck? I don’t even know what an essential oil is? Well Casey + Kristen have awesome classes you should check out starting with Intro to Oils. Casey also has a Facebook group, Casey Leigh Essentials you can join, and the Baby Steps website has some great content! You can visit me on instagram @wynnesessentials. My handy-dandy pocket reference guide goes with me pretty much everywhere. You have to do your own research, and make sure you know exactly how to apply the oils. I promise, once you get into it, it’s not overwhelming anymore – but somewhat addicting. It’s a LIFESTYLE change, and one we are so happy and encouraged to be on.
If you have any questions, feel free to comment, or email me [firstname.lastname@example.org] or would like to sign up and join our team visit this link here!
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
it’s really refreshing to be around people who OWN THEIR STORY.
this past weekend I spent 5 days with women from around the country who are fearlessly owning their stories, and devoting time and energy to speak on behalf of the vunerable. Yes, I’m talking about my Noonday Collection tribe. I love these women – women from all seasons of life who are passionate, humble, gracious, and fierce! Our leader, Jessica, speaks to my heart so much. She’s a dear friend and sister and her freedom over the years has trickled down to on me.
I see her living her ONE life wild + free on fire for Jesus and I want that. I don’t want to live in this shame that I so often live in, but I want to OWN MY STORY and truly live alive.
One of my favorite things Jess said over the weekend was “When each of us owns our true story, we exude the type of gracious confidence that other women want to be around.”
Yes, let’s be those kind of women. “Women who’s identity does not depend on depriving others of theirs.” Instead of feeling shameful that I am a work-from-
home studio mama, I am going to own the fact that God gave me this passion, drive, connection, influence, and vision to be a self starter and creative! I am going to [so many Jessica quotes!] “understand my limitations and reach out and ask for help,” I am going to own the fact that when we move, I might need some extra help on non-school days from a sweet college girl. I am going to own this opportunity as a chance to pour into a college student, give my kids a valuable experience, and give myself grace and permission to do what God has created me to do!
this is vunerability. this is living alive. this is owning my story.
** also, never thought I’d be the “infertility girl” but thankful God can use my story to bring Him glory. read more on the carry camp here.**
what’s your story? how has God created YOU to be? Because the amazing thing is, He doesn’t create us all the same. He created me to be creative-dreamer-connector-story teller-visionary-writer-influencer-advocate-traveler-high capacity starter! How did He create you?
own it and be free.
let’s stop comparing ourselves to each other, and run our own race with humility and tenacity. let’s speak life into our friends – lets call out the goodness we see in them. let’s give them words that they can cling to. so many of my words came from truth spoken into me by someone who knows and loves me. sometimes they can see things in me that I can’t see in me. lets speak up!
“lets practice vunerability and connection a lot more, and comparison and perfectionism a lot less.”
love how my friend Megan so vulnerably put it…
“I’m not going to be afraid to do what I’m good at doing, and I encourage you to do the same. We are all playing a vital part in this story, and we all need each other to make the best version of this story, this story that is changing the world. So let’s stop being preoccupied with shrinking back, with looking inward, with being afraid of what others will think…let’s stand and claim the freedom that is already afforded to us. Let’s take action to shine, not for us, but for others. Let’s get over ourselves and be free.”
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