#$%@ People Say to Transracial Families

So, I think I’ve watched this video 10 times at least & shared it with so many friends.
friends that have transracial families + friends that don’t.
I sorta wish me & my crew had thought of this.
I think it’s so truthful and funny.
I know that it can be awkward knowing what to say/not to say to transracial families.
It used to be awkward for me when I saw people that I so desperately wanted to know their story.
and it’s ok to ask – just in a non offensive way.  
most things in this video to me are totally ok: where are they from?  I love their hair!  They are so beautiful.  
and some just are awkward to hear: they are so lucky, you are so amazing.  
why you ask?
because they are the kids god picked for our family.  we aren’t amazing, we were just being obedient.  and although the process was hard, it was worth every second.  I don’t think I”m any more amazing than my friends who birthed their babies (gees, I’m terrified of that!)  they do have a better life here, but all their past hurt and pain doesn’t automatically go away because they are in America now. 
and then some are just not ok.  
are those your real kids?
as you all know, we chose adoption.  god intervened in our story before we went down the infertility treatment path with adoption.  so, these are our real kids.  no, they didn’t come from my body but they are just as much my “real kids” as any kids we would be blessed to have biologically.
are they real siblings?
I think this is the hardest.  
my babies were 9 months & 10 months when we brought them home.
( I just realized I need to write out ashers story still for you all!)
so obviously they are not biologically related.
but they ARE real siblings. 
{you might have noticed that I have used the word “biological” a lot.  I do it in conversation too.  It’s because I”m trying to get people talking my language.}
but I am not super sensitive to the questions and remarks I get when we are out in public.  
we knew it wasn’t going to be all butterflies & roses raising two brown kids 
but we truly believe that their adoption is a beautiful picture of the gospel and if they spark conversations that bring other orphans to their forever families, or point people to Christ – then bring it on!!
so next time you see a transracial family, especially ones that have adopted kids, tell them how beautiful their children are and if you are interested in their story, tell em so!  Most of us really do love the opportunity to talk about it.  

Hey, I'm Wynne!

Hi, friend! First, I truly am so giddy that you are here. I want you to know I believe in you and all the ways you are growing towards living a more intentional life.  I genuinely hope you are encouraged from our time together here.

A little about me, I’m a type 7 on the enneagram, a total extrovert + people lover, entrepreneur, connector, storyteller, people gatherer, and passionate wife, mama + friend. I feel most alive when I’m exploring new places and surrounded by people I love. Give me a day in the outdoors disconnected from wifi, and I am a happy girl. I run on oat milk lattes, Jesus, gratitude journaling and kitchen dance parties with my four kids.
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let'e be friends

  1. Jenny Marrs says:

    So well said, Wynne! 🙂 {And, I love that video too!!}

  2. Unknown says:

    You know what’s crazy? I get the very similar questions with my two stepdaughters and my biological daughter. And my stepdaughters even look like me. I get asked about my relationship with their mother in front of them. People are crazy! Your babies are so adorable and I am so happy you found your family as we have found ours (in non-traditional ways).

  3. HA-LARIOUS! I think the video is funny… I can only imagine the things that you hear (and, that you don’t!). I love questions – asking them and answering them… and, I believe as bloggers we like to talk and tell stories and hear others’ stories, as well. Which like you said is fine… It’s just making sure it’s appropriate and thoughtful.

    What I do think is sad though is the sterotyping of adoption and the ignorance that can come along with transracial adoption. I definitely need to begin praying for strength, wisdom, and patience in dealing with these things throughout you and your family’s life.

    Thanks for sharing!!

  4. Kara M says:

    Ha ha ha..I have a similar post with this video waiting to be posted! My family and I were dying laughing! My sister’s face to the “do black babies cost more” comment was hilarious! Oh people!!

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