sticking with my regular programing, I’m adding a #fertilityfriday into the mix of this series.
I remember so vividly writing this note on my phone. I was staying at one of my dearest friend, Shannon’s house in Austin this spring. I wanted so desperately to have a free moment to sit down and actually write what was going on in that spinning head of mine, but a note in my phone was all I could muster.
I haven’t really talked about this on the blog, but you all know we’ve been struggling with infertility for the past 5+ years. what you don’t know, is in the spring we did our first [and only so far] IVF cycle with our fertility doctor in Austin.
my spring was so crazy nuts y’all. left march 7th for created for care retreat outside Atlanta, Georgia for the weekend, then straight from there to Jinja, Uganda for my first ever blogger trip, then home for a few days before starting our IVF cycle in Austin. then to Dallas to speak at Hope Spoken, then to Waco where me and the kids made our home base for the entire month long cycle. I drove back + forth to Austin every 2 days for sonograms, and then the last week my parents were moving [oh boy] so me and the kids got out of the way and just stayed in Austin that entire week, between sonograms.
we quite literally stayed with a different friend every night. which probably prepared us for our #wactour a few months later. we spent time with some of our most favorite people, ate all our favorite austin restaurants, and had a lot of fun – but it was cra-zy.
amidst tears and tantrums [by both me and the kids] I realized that home is most defiantly wherever I’m with my little tribe. sure, I missed my bed, I missed my friends and community at home, and I missed routine and normalcy. sure I uttered words, through tears, like “if this doesn’t work I will be SO mad!” you know how it turned out. it didn’t work. we retrieved the eggs, and implanted 1 embryo on Easter Sunday, my 30th birthday. I was so sure that new life was coming. a new decade, resurrection, easter sunday!
I’ll tell you more about that later, but today I’m just reflecting on that season.
knowing and believing, no matter how hard it was, there was a reason for it.
home is wherever I’m with you.
catch up on the rest of my #notetoself series here.
Hey, I'm Wynne!
Hi, friend! First, I truly am so giddy that you are here. I want you to know I believe in you and all the ways you are growing towards living a more intentional life. I genuinely hope you are encouraged from our time together here.
A little about me, I’m a type 7 on the enneagram, a total extrovert + people lover, entrepreneur, connector, storyteller, people gatherer, and passionate wife, mama + friend. I feel most alive when I’m exploring new places and surrounded by people I love. Give me a day in the outdoors disconnected from wifi, and I am a happy girl. I run on oat milk lattes, Jesus, gratitude journaling and kitchen dance parties with my four kids.
Welcome, come on in!
Oh Wynne, I had NO idea you guys were doing IVF! What a big commitment on so many levels! I’m so, so sorry it didn’t end in a pregnancy. That is seriously tough stuff. 🙁 Sending you guys hugs and saying prayers for you as you continue on this journey! I know it’s just absolutely so hard to have so much disappointment. 🙁 We haven’t been down the IVF path yet, but I know if we did it would be heartbreaking after ALL you go through with that to not have it turn into a pregnancy.
Home is something I am so ready to establish. I want to put down roots and find what home means to me after a long season of transitioning, but earlier in the year the Lord told me that I will be in transition for quite some time. It’s encouraging to hear that home does not have to be a place but it can be a people! And my community (even though it’s changed, too) has made each place more of a home base than anything else. Thanks for sharing so willingly and vulnerably!
I’ve been there – and know what an emotional roller-coaster you’ve been on. This infertility journey is a difficult one – and IVF is especially tough. I did two cycles and when the first didn’t work I almost gave up. It was a test of endurance and of my faith. Took many months before I was emotionally and spiritually ready to take any next step in the journey. Praying for you and your journey!
[…] I wasn’t already completely exhausted enough, I went straight into our first IVF cycle and spent a month tearing up I-35 between Waco and Austin away from home + my […]